I feel guilty…

I hear this statement from every single mother I work with. (And I feel it too!)

When you admit to having desires outside of motherhood and dreaming things that don’t involve your children, you’ll feel guilty.

You’ll feel guilty when you feed your kids fish fingers because you haven’t had the time to cook from scratch. You’ll feel guilty when you are writing an email instead of playing with them. You’ll feel guilty when you take up a class or a job that takes you away from them.

Yes, guilt is part of the motherhood package. And, it’s also a part of the creative process of bringing your desires to life. You’ll feel like you are letting people down. You’ll say “no” more often and feel guilty about letting go of relationships that don’t feel your happy cup.

You’ll feel guilty…

You get the gist. There is no way around guilt other than through it. There is no way to get rid of it or even manage it. We are going to feel it.

However, I’d like to tell you that it’s BECAUSE you are guilty that you are a good mum.

Bad mums don’t feel guilty. That’s why they are incompetent. They don’t question their actions and don’t realise the consequences on their actions.

You, on the other hand, love your children so much that you worry about being a good enough mum. You want to be there for them and give them your time and attention. Give your best. Give what you can. Be ok with falling short sometimes. We all do. Feel guilty but don’t dwell on it and most of all, don’t let it stop you from chasing those all-important desires of yours.

When you are fulfilled and you feel good, you can be of more service to your children and your whole family.

Nancy Ajavon